lol I just. YES OKAY.

This is pretty interesting to me at least. Up until relatively recently in Aather, Naha didn't actually have much of a sex life. She'd had sex with two people, and both times were pretty much entirely based on an economy of comfort/self-comfort. Like, Naha had slept with Nii! Pretty much it happened because she was angry and needed a distraction/as a method of self-comfort (since Nii certainly wasn't offering comfort.) She also made a pass at Itachi asking for a somewhat more mutual comfort which he turned down. Probably wisely.

But she kept getting positive sex memories (seriously, so many positive sex memories) and while she's gotten negative memories, few of them were of the stuff that really hurts Naha's relationship with sex. Which means that while Naha is pretty precarious, while she is healthy, and with the memory set she's had, she moved into a place of expanding sex to a means of sharing affection and attention beyond comfort, which eventually led to sleeping with Cass. Their relationship is based a lot of Cass's need for affection and approval, and Naha's desire (for now, at least) to provide that. And Naha enjoys it and cares for Cass, so it was pretty good in that respect!

Jason kind of falls back to comfort a little, but Naha was offering comfort from a very different place. She does like him, and he's surprisingly good at getting her to want to be tender for him. Not to fix him. Naha isn't really a fixer. But yes, offering comfort and companionship in a style with which Naha is confident.

Spike is. How to put this. Like. Entirely for fun. He is totally for funsies. Naha likes him! And I don't say this to say it's shallow exactly. In some ways, Naha is probably the healthiest there because it really is like. We could have fun casual sex let's do that. Yes.

So circling back to Cass, their relationship has been getting to a better place since the whole flare up of jealousy, and Cass has been taking interesting steps with her. So it's. Actually all pretty good! And I wouldn't call it balanced, exactly, but it's in a surprisingly healthy place, which could also be said of all of Naha's sex life at this point. Or Naha in general!

SO LIKE SEGUEING IN TO TEMPA, he is. Difficult. So difficult. And so relevant because Naha still wants him. Naha always wants him. He was her primary lover for pretty much ever, and even when that changed it wasn't in any way or by any means because Naha stopped loving him or being attracted to him. But. Naha. Hates him. A lot. Too. So much hate. And it will probably get worse before it gets better because I have some nice huge sig negs still to come in that respect. And so that's difficult, and something Naha cuts off for now without too much trouble because of the hate.

And in light of that, her sex life in Aather, even if it is surprisingly healthy, is something of a stop gap instead of just being a healthy expression of a very, very sexual god.'-'

And in that vein, she does use it (and uses Ruby), to reinforce a particular version of herself, the healthier version, that she'd rather be. It creates a type of feedback, and expectation, that Naha responds to and helps her put on a good show of being healthier than she actually is. So to a degree it's still a tool which Naha deploys on some level to "control" herself when she can't actually control herself. Similar, in a way, to arranging things so she didn't kill Van. Though less damaging in a lot of ways... um. It still on the one hand keeps her surprisingly healthy, and on the other contributes to that health being very precarious.

...I could babble about this forever. I will stop there.'-'

Canon mates you desperately want?